Some beautiful flowers I saw in Eugene the other day. Anyone know what they are?

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I had been sensing something was off with my body for awhile. My nose was running nonstop. I wondered if it was allergies, but I had a feeling I had caught something. It stayed as a runny nose for quite awhile. My immunity seemed down. We needed to run some errands on the morning of my birthday. When we got home, I realized I was sick. (It seems like often times when I’ve gotten sick, we’ve happened to be out of cod liver oil. When I take it regularly it really seems to help my immunity.) My throat started hurting, I felt congested, my chest heavy. I was extra glad we decided not to go to market because I wouldn’t have wanted to get sick out in the cold and rain. Jeff made me some magical tea that really helped my throat. I went to bed. I noticed in the night that Bracken had a light fever. We usually get things together. On Saturday I didn’t feel great, but on Sunday I started feeling really lousy. I had no appetite, a headache, and just walking out to the chicken coop and back with Bracken took all my energy. All I could really do was lie down. If I stood up I felt weak, lightheaded, or nauseous. Every time I tried to eat, food didn’t taste good to me and I felt repelled by it. Normally I have a voracious appetite. (Just ask Jeff.) As I was laying on the couch, Bracken came over and snuggled with me a few times and then went and grabbed a blanket and put it on me. It really melted my heart. I wanted to distract myself from how awful I felt, so Bracken and I went over to the computer and picked out a movie on Netflix. When do I ever watch movies during the day? Hardly ever. I don’t even remember the last time. But whenever I got sick growing up, my mom would let me lay on the couch and watch a movie, so the idea comforted me. We chose Hachi: A Dog’s Tale. Partway through our electricity went out. (It’s been pouring here for days. Sometimes when it’s stormy it goes out.) Eventually the power came back on and we finished watching the movie. I cried like crazy. It was nice to have the distraction of watching a movie. My entire body was aching. I’d go from being cold to hot. It seemed like I was spitting up phlegm every few seconds, which made my stomach feel queasy. I kept feeling like I had to throw up, but I would go over to the toilet and nothing would happen. Bracken came over to me and patted me on the back a few times. It was so sweet. It’s not easy caring for a little one when you feel so terrible, but Bracken was pretty wonderful for the most part. Finally I did throw up and immediately felt so much better. I was able to eat a popsicle after that. Then I went to sleep. I woke up in the night with a painful migraine. (Probably from the lack of food.) It made for a restless sleep. This morning I woke up and my headache was gone, thank goodness. I smelled soup on the stove and it actually smelled good to me. I managed to eat a little bit. Still exhausted and not really functional, Bracken and I watched another dog movie, this time: Red Dog. Also made me cry. Then Bracken had an extra long nap and I read a book. As I’m finally emerging, I don’t remember the last time I felt that sick. At first I thought it was a cold, but after the body aches and vomiting decided it was the flu. Bracken’s light fever went away quickly. His nose was a little runny, then clogged, but he seems like he only had a very mild version of what I had. I’m really hoping Jeff won’t get it. 

The blessing in disguise? It seems like my body forced me to slow down when I really needed to. I have a hard time giving myself permission to do that sometimes. The thing about feeling so awful in your body is that after you’re over the worst, incredibly humbled by pain, you emerge with a new quietness and a sense of peace. You go a little slower. You’re reminded not to take your body- and all it does for you everyday- for granted. You feel weak and exhausted, but the lack of pain makes your body feel in pure bliss. Tasting food- and having it taste good again- makes it taste better than it ever has before. Beauty in each moment is more readily noticed. You come out on the other side with a renewed sense to enjoy feeling good.
And it’s a gift to remember that.